Like or Dislike

It is interesting how quickly we like those who tell us what we want to hear and dislike those who, perhaps, tell us what we are unwilling to hear.
Recently my 17-year old daughter and I have been visiting a slew of doctors in order to fully understand a knee injury that she incurred during a soccer game in the late fall. The knee had not fully healed and we wanted to get to the source of her pain.
So last week off we went to Specialist #1. Within fifteen minutes this doctor told us bluntly that my daughter needed to have arthroscopic surgery to repair her knee. My jaw dropped, my heart stopped. No way, I thought. This is not happening. I immediately disliked this guy.
Not willing to believe Specialist #1, my daughter had a second MRI and off we went to Specialist #2. This doctor reviewed her records and recommended that she rest for another six weeks and get a shot of cortisone. He didn’t see the need for immediate surgery. I smiled and cheered. I instantly felt like hugging this guy.
Sitting in the middle of two opposing views, we went off to see Specialist #3 in Philadelphia who confirmed what both other specialists had said. Yes, she could wait and rest but there was no guarantee that it would heal and yes, it would be advisable for her to have her knee surgically repaired. By this point I was so exhausted with liking, disliking and trying to contrive the diagnosis that I wanted to hear that I finally released control of the matter. Liking or disliking anyone was not going to change what we inevitably needed to do. We are scheduling her surgery as I write this.
It’s been a great lesson for me. Next time I feel aversion towards someone or something I will pause and contemplate what, perhaps, I am unwilling to hear or see.
“The everyday practice is simply to develop a complete acceptance and openness to all situations and emotions and to all people, experiencing everything totally without mental reservations and blockages, so that one never withdraws or centralizes into oneself.” ~Chogyam Trungpa

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